Adler emphasized that difficulties stem from our relationships with others. When we are surrounded by people who are similar to us, such as classmates, colleagues, or friends, it can be easy to fall into the trap of comparing ourselves to others.
In the past, we often compared ourselves to others based on our similarities and differences, such as who had a better title, who traveled to more exotic places, or who made more money.
To avoid such comparisons, one solution is to simply distance ourselves from these communities. If we can’t see what others have, we won’t feel the pressure to compare ourselves. However, this is not always possible in today’s interconnected world where we rely on the internet to communicate and exchange information.
In the past, I used to blame myself when I didn’t get what I wanted. But over time, I realized that if everyone eventually gets what they are meant to have in life, then not having it now must have a different reason.
If I find myself becoming envious of someone, I remind myself to be grateful for their blessings and to trust that I will also receive what I need in life.
It’s important to step back from comparing ourselves to others and return to our own state of mind. Otherwise, we can easily get caught up in a vicious cycle of negative thoughts.
Comparisons are a natural human tendency, but we can train ourselves to not let them consume us. We can learn to recognize when our thoughts are heading down this path and make a conscious effort to disengage from them.
It’s important to acknowledge and accept these negative feelings, but not let them control us. Instead, we can treat them as just a piece of information and let them pass, without getting overly attached to them.